How to become successful without having a success first?

Image by Sophie Ledesma on Behance 

I was watching the second episode of Ryan Murphy’s Netflix series Hollywood when one of the characters, an aspiring filmmaker trying to get his movie produced, is told by the studio that he needs to work on another screenplay and make it a success before thinking about bringing forth his own project because he admitted “You know how it is, the way to be successful, is to have a success”. This line really stuck with me. This I figured a long time ago, is how we are expected to operate in society, first get something under our belts, something remarkable, something that exudes success before even attempting at being successful. This may sound a little abstract but let me put it in simpler, more practical terms: you need to have done a couple great internships in order to get your first placement, you need to have substantial work experience before landing your dream job. This sounds like a solid system in place, it sounds fair because it champions effort and determination as well as providing a roadmap anybody can follow because it is easy at the end of the day…if you just do something first you can get to do something bigger later. 

But my question is: how are we supposed to get the first small success in order to further ourselves? How are we supposed to get work experience in order to land our first job? Or enough relevant work experience to further our career? We are told this linear idea of success and this straightforward formula to pursue our dreams: smaller successes lead to bigger success. We are told, this is how everybody does it, this has to work for you too, if it doesn’t then there is something wrong with you. We are so busy finding entry points to get our first small successes to move along the imaginary ladder that we never stop and think about this formula: we don’t look into it, we don’t question it.

How can we have workable connections in an industry if you are just starting out? How are we supposed to get work experience if we are fresh out of college and we just spent all our time getting that degree? How can we get our creative of business idea endorsed if we don’t have any previous comparable experience? This my friends, is the old chicken-and-the-egg predicament: How to get eggs without a chicken? If you have some eggs, will they become chickens? If you have a chicken, will it make a sufficient amount of eggs? Will the eggs be good enough? I can go on and on this conversation, will turn into a oyakodon (Japanese chicken and egg rice).

What I have gathered is that this formula was invented and propagated to give people a sense of structure and hope, ignoring all the other variables that go into the formula; however, as you may have figured out already, it is not this simple nor this formula is a guarantee for any success. Here is what I have learnt:

Fake your way into it

Sometimes it is the only way. When we can’t possibly gather enough small successes to get where we want to go or simply we can’t find our entry point it’s time to get creative and act to others (and mostly to ourselves) as if we are already making it. Perhaps, what we have so far is good enough to bring us to the next level.

Work your way into it

You may say, well isn’t this what the success formula is all about? Well not really, what I mean is, just do the work, continue doing the work even if doesn’t necessarily lead to be the bigger milestone we have been aiming to reach but at least it will lead us somewhere. The key is to keep our cool and faith while we do the grind because deep down we need to be convinced that it will get us somewhere.

Befriend your way into it

Humans are pack animals, and as such where we stand in the pack and who we know in the pack is of the essence. It is often not how qualified we are but who we know that can help us to get the opportunity to show what we are capable of. Doing the work is surely crucial though we often forget about the importance of knowing the right people and getting ourselves into spaces where we don’t necessarily belong (faking our way is definitely needed for this one as well).

Live your way into it

Pursuing success is a way of life, is a decision we take each single day to determine how to act and how to think because getting to our ideal point may take a lot of time, perhaps a whole lifetime; in the meantime, let’s live and breathe the success of trying to make it as the journey is a much part of the victory as victory itself.

Buy your way into it

Let’s not forget the formula doesn’t apply to everybody, some people buy their way into it may be because of actual money or sometimes it’s not as straightforward as cash, success can be bought through leveraging resources such as family, power, connections and so on. So, unless we can do this ourselves (no judgement there), then let’s be patient and stay determined, time at the end of the day is also money; if we put enough of endurance and resilience into our own success journey then we can be on our way to our triumph without paying much attention to any damn chickens or eggs.